Third Quarter

I’m happy to report that my spunky new backpack works well. It is comfy and has good pockets and delightful colors. (Thanks for the Christmas present!)

I’m also happy to report that I did not fail my classes last semester. My grades are posted, and I passed both Business Associations (despite a few minutes of absolutely not knowing what to write about during the final) and Public International Law. My PIL grade actually startled me. I stared at it for two minutes to make sure it was real because it was so much higher than I expected. Either my paper was better than I thought or my class participation had a bigger impact than I expected.

Mostly, I’m just grateful for that small confidence boost, because at the beginning of this week I was feeling very third quarter-ish.

In high school when I was learning to run one- and two-mile races, my coach told me that the third quarter of the race is the hardest. During the first half, you aren’t really tired yet. During the last quarter, adrenaline kicks in because you are almost done. But during the third quarter, you’re tired, your body wants to stop, the finish line looks far away, and your mind starts playing tricks on you.

This semester starts the third quarter of my law school experience. And it felt like it. I wasn’t sure I was ready to tackle another semester.

But I’m feeling better now that I’ve started. Working is better than waiting.

I have five classes this semester. Four of them only meet once a week;  the fifth meets twice a week. That means I’m not in school very much, but I have a lot of reading to do between each class. And a lot of time to forget what I read.

Here’s a quick rundown of my classes:

1. Business and Financial Literacy: Our first class felt like a crash course in Accounting 101. I think this class will be useful, but I don’t expect it to be really thrilling. For example, my book mentioned a 57,000 page tax return (filed by GE in 2010); that’s just not something I can get excited about.

2. Employment Law: This class will cover the definition of “employee”, hiring, terminating employment, work regulations, etc. That first topic is surprisingly difficult. The OSHA definition for employee is “an employee of an employer who is employed  in a business of his employer.” I’m personally partial to the duck test mentioned by the judge in Estrada v. FedEx Ground Package System, Inc.: “if it looks like a duck, walks like a duck, swims like a duck, and quacks like a duck, it is a duck.” 64 Cal. Rptr. 3d 327 (2007).

Bonus: My EL professor also does circus law. Yes, there is such a thing. Apparently the circus rents its tigers.

Ducks.

Not ducks.

I think they were getting ready for a round of
"King of the Hill." All the ducks were on the
platform, while all the geese swam around as
if they were coordinating an attack.

3. Religion Clauses of the Constitution: So far the main issue in this class is finding a workable limiting principle to religious freedom. How can the law protect free exercise of religion without imposing on non-adherents? Where should the government draw the line on issues like smoking peyote, animal sacrifices, and conscience-inspired action? This class is thought-provoking and I have some strong opinions about how the law should (and should not) act. I have to watch myself so I don’t get too defensive about it.

4. Property Theory: This class is what I hoped law school would be like before I came. It consists of somewhat philosophical discussions (centered on Property law, of course) of ideas and principles and their implications. For example, we discussed the idea that property is a pseudo version of the person it belongs to. In other words, your stuff is, in some sense, you, and everyone else should leave it/you alone. Our class is a small group (about 10 people), which makes it easy to participate. And we have plans for bringing food. (This may end up being my favorite class.)

I love the silhouettes of bare tree
branches against the winter sky.

5. Advanced Practice (Transactional): This is my last required course in law school. It is one of several options, the others being appellate practice, criminal law, or civil law. The transactional course is new this year (good timing, because I have no interest in the litigation-oriented classes) and focuses on drafting legal documents (contracts, wills, trusts, real estate transactions, etc.).

In this week’s reading, the book warns about typos (like the one that almost cost a company $92,855,000.00 instead of $92,855.00 ^a); ambiguous punctuation (like the so-called Million Dollar Comma ^b); and ambiguous language (somewhere in Australia, “shall” means “must”, except when it means “may”, “should”, or “will” ^c). The book also cautions against raising the ire of grammar traditionalists (some people get really upset if you split infinitives) and persnickety superiors (some judges have referred to the use of “and/or” as an “inexcusable barbarism”, or called it a “befuddling nameless thing, that Janus-faced verbal monstrosity” ^d). But the book still advocates a common sense approach to simplifying grammar and language (while still defending the Oxford comma), so it isn’t too irksome.

^(a) Prudential Ins. Co. v. S. S. Am. Aquarius, 870 F.2d 867 (2d Circuit 1989).

^(b) George W. Kuney, Elements of Contract Drafting, 4th Ed., p. 50 (2014).

^(c) Id. at 42.

^(d) Id. at 41.

This semester should be interesting. I’m not quite on the law school homestretch, but it feels good to be in the second half.

__________________________________________

We had an ice storm last week. It left
the world looking like it was coated
in crystal.

After the weather added a dusting of snow, the woods
were glistening with thick, story-book frost.

Then it warmed back up, leaving piles of
ice like shattered glass on the ground and
eventually resulting in raining trees
(by which I mean the trees were dripping
rain, as opposed to the frightening idea
of trees falling from the sky like rain).