Recommendation

Most of my week has been spent studying for finals, which means lots of case and law review, lots of screen time on my computer, and lots of sitting in the same position (I can tell when I’m running out of steam by how frequently I get up to stretch).

I have done a few things besides studying. I started my annual reading of A Christmas Carol, by Charles Dickens (which gave me some much appreciated mental relief); worked on a Relief Society lesson; attended the baptism of the newest member of our ward; and participated in our ward choir Christmas program (which went really well, thanks to the talent and passion of those in charge).

Speaking of Christmas music, the Christmas version of Hallelujah by Cloverton is excellent.

Well, time for a stretch…

In Which I Finally Understand East Coast Claustrophobia

I’m sitting at my table listening to Christmas music and thinking about the last week. It has flown by in a hodgepodge of events and emotions. I had two busy days of class and homework and packing, followed by a quick trip home for Grandpa’s funeral, followed by a few days back in Williamsburg that felt as if they were somehow in a separate category than normal weekdays.

It was so good to be home. It lasted for little more than 24 hours, but I needed that day there. I arrived early Wednesday morning after an evening flight and smiled when I saw the snow through the airplane window. (Dear Snow, Please come to Williamsburg this year!) During the drive home it was so relieving to be under a wide open sky. (I now understand why people talk about being claustrophobic on the East coast – it’s not fear, it’s just the oppression of being continuously surrounded by trees.) By the time Dad and I arrived at the house, everyone else was in bed. Dad turned in soon afterward. As it was nearly 4 am EST, I didn’t last much longer, but I stayed up a few more minutes just to enjoy the feeling of being home (and to read the comics).

I awoke the next morning to a bunch of hugs.

If a funeral can be described as fun, then Grandpa Quilter’s was fun. Not that it was tear-less, but stronger and deeper than the feeling of missing him was the same sort of cheerful love that I’ve always felt around Grandpa. There were good stories and plenty of laughs. It was a treat to see so much of the family gathered together. I expect that Grandpa enjoyed it, and I certainly did. What a legacy he and Grandma have built for us.

My trip back to Williamsburg was pleasant. I had a taste of Grandpa Quilter’s small world and large circle of friends: my neighbor on the first plane was a woman who knew Grandpa from his years of teaching seminary where her children attended school and from swimming at the same rec center where he used to swim.

I arrived back in Virginia to 65 degree weather and trotted to my car in the economy lot with my coat hanging uselessly over my shoulder. (I’ve been teasing my family about the temperature. It was 12ish degrees in Salt Lake City when I left. Grand Junction was around 7. Rexburg was something like -5.)

I spent the next couple of days finishing my regular homework and trying to get excited about studying for finals. Friday afternoon I helped set up for my stake’s annual Christmas open house (live music and 100+ nativity scenes, including a live one). Today I pulled out a few Christmas decorations (including a new addition from my kind upstairs neighbor). It’s been so nice to do some things that are completely different and separate from law school.

I didn’t really feel back on schedule until this morning at ward choir practice. Though I’m not sure that feeling will last since I don’t have regular classes tomorrow.

On my to do list for this week: take my Torts final, study for Crim Law and Civ Pro, and squeeze in some Christmas shopping.

Reference Point

My final memo was finished and submitted this week – early on Monday morning. I have never been so relieved to have an assignment finished. (My Monday afternoon culminated in a long nap.)

The Potomac River on Thanksgiving morning.

I spent Thanksgiving up in Sterling with my aunt and uncle. It was a pleasant holiday at a home away from home. I went for my annual Thanksgiving morning run (this time to the Potomac River). We ate a large and delicious meal. We played games (“Citadels” is very fun) and watched movies. Thanks to the Prices for a nice holiday!

Also this week, my Grandpa Quilter passed away. To me it was at the same time unexpected and unsurprising. I’ve been okay. I will miss Grandpa, but mostly I feel so blessed to be his granddaughter.

Several years ago, Grandpa shared a scripture with me:

“For there is a time appointed for every man, according as his works shall be.”

Doctrine and Covenants 121:25

Grandpa, thank you for doing your work so well. I love you!

At times it seems as though all of my reference points are being rearranged, everything from roads to weather to relationships to thinking patterns. However, the Savior is my one reference point that never moves. And that’s enough.

Fifteen Minutes of Trial and the Four Broadway Memo

The W&M 1L class is terrific. The law school has an annual Thanksgiving Basket Competition between the 1L sections. Well, basket is a bit of a misnomer. It’s more of a pile-of-donated-food-in-a-creative-way competition. The previous record was about 4000 cans of food. This year’s 1L class: 7000+ cans of food and some donated cash on the side! (The lobby was very crowded.) I have some great (and very creative) colleagues.

That was the major event at school this week.

A recent, much more minor event took place in Civil Procedure. A class on court rules and procedures would seem to need a lot of time spent on talking about trials. Not so much. We covered trials in 15 minutes and moved right on to preclusion. The part of law that draws the most attention in popular culture is one of its smallest components.

My big project of the week was my final legal memo. For an idea of how much time I’ve spent working on it, I’ve managed to listen to Phantom of the Opera, Les Miserables, Wicked, and The Lion King (Broadway version). And I’ve had some silent work time as well. Happily, it will be done tomorrow morning.

Which is also why I’m going to bed now.

Short Observations

I have twenty-one classes and three finals left of my first semester of law school. (I’ve always enjoyed counting down those sorts of things.) This has felt like the shortest semester of my entire educational experience. I might, however, change my mind about that during finals when my three tests are spread out over two weeks.

My schedule for spring semester was posted the other day. I won’t have any classes before 10:00, which feels incredibly late in the day to get things going. And I thought an 8:30 class was late.

Of course, morning hours are a great time for homework and running, so a 10:00 schedule will be nice in that regard.

Best recent discovery: there is a track about two miles from my apartment. I’m very happy to have a large rubber circle to run on.

Second best recent discovery: the library is deliciously silent on Saturday mornings before it opens (I accidentally left for work half an hour early on Saturday…this is what happens when each day starts at a different time).

Also, the Jamestown Ward loves Muddy Buddies. They made short work of the batch I brought for today’s Linger Longer. Chex + chocolate + peanut butter + powdered sugar = yum.

***

Torts case of the week: thaw causes large chunks of ice to float down river…ice piles up by boat 1, causing it to come loose from post…boat 1 floats away into boat 2, causing boat 2 to come loose…boat 2 drifts into drawbridge, bringing down one of bridge’s towers…boat 1 enters the wreckage and wedges into boat 2, creating a dam…bridge’s second tower falls…banks of river flood for several miles. Petition of Kinsman Transit Co., 338 F.2d 708 (2d Cir. 1964).

It’s like a handy analogy for when life seems to be piling up all around and threatening to engulf you. (No, that’s not what life is like for me right now; I’m just making an observation.)

Scattered

This week I discovered a new joy: running through falling leaves. A long road lined with tall trees (in kaleidoscopic colors) mixed with a little wind makes for an almost magical atmosphere.

I also made the happy discovery that music helps me focus on homework. This was a surprise because in the past I always found music to be a distraction – or at least I convinced myself it would be a distraction and never listened to any while doing homework. But that is not the case with law. When I’m having a hard time concentrating, I turn on some tunes and somehow that works better than silence.

Food also helps.

Cold weather in Williamsburg seems to take a wade-slowly-into-the-pool rather than a jump-in-the-deep-end approach. The temperature has gotten down below 35 degrees once or twice, but then it slides right back up above 60. So maybe it’s more of a dip-a-toe-in-the-water-and-decide-it’s-too-cold-and-come-back-later approach.

My car in the morning. It looks like more leaves in real life.

School news: I forgot to go to class one day. I left Torts with my mind on other things, went to the lobby, and sat down to eat my apple. A bit later it dawned on me that I should have been in Legal Practice for the last fifteen minutes. That was a first for me; I’ve come close to sleeping through a class once or twice, but I haven’t forgotten about class before.

In my defense, the Legal Practice class schedule is constantly changing. Our regular Tuesday and Thursday classes are often cancelled for Library lectures, labs, or individual conferences. And our adjunct class is often cancelled for individual mock client counseling, client interviews, or oral reports.

(No worries: I did make it to the last forty minutes of class, and no problems ensued.)

One of my major homework activities this week was highlighting portions of the Federal Rules of Civil Procedure, including rules for summons, personal jurisdiction, subject matter jurisdiction, venue, joinder, impleading… I could keep going. Civil Pro is a somewhat tangled topic.

Scattered leaves, scattered focus, scattered weather, scattered class schedule, scattered homework.

Good thing there's music. And food.

Refuge

This week in Criminal Law we discussed a very difficult topic. My homework for those classes constituted the most unpleasant reading I have ever done.

It wasn’t unpleasant because it was surprising; I understand that there is a great deal of evil in the world, and in a law school setting I expect to encounter some of the most abhorrent things in life. Instead, the unpleasantness came from the nature of the topic and from seeing it up close. Being in close proximity to something repulsive touches your mind and emotions in a way that nebulous and undefined evil does not.

I suppose I’ve had a rather sheltered life. I’ve never been subjected to certain ideas. I’ve never had to deal with the difficulties those ideas raise. Some people might view that kind of life as a weakness. They might see it as silly or naïve or out of touch. But I am so, so grateful for it.

I’m grateful I grew up in a strong family and a good home. I’m grateful I was raised by righteous parents who taught me the Gospel. I’m grateful I’ve been surrounded by good influences and opportunities. Because of those things, I still recognize that good is stronger than evil, and that most people still want what it good.

I'm grateful I don’t have to be afraid of the world, because I know how to find the good in it.

***

Quick seasonal report: The trees in Williamsburg are now a bright mix of greens, oranges, reds, yellows, and browns. And thanks to daylight savings time (and our location on the eastern edge of the time zone) the sunset today was at 5:06. I tend to read at nighttime, so maybe that will help me get my homework done earlier…

Entertainment

This week has been entertaining.

First, the weather cooled down a little and I managed to run twenty miles over the course of the week. I haven’t done that much for a long time and it felt really good. Yay for a long fall season. And yay for sea level oxygen, which makes me feel like I’m in better shape than I really am. (The cooler weather also brings the added bonus of decreasing the bug population – or at least driving it underground.)

The neighborhood woodland trail.

Second, I took my first law school exam. It was a low-key experience (75 minutes long, worth 5% of my grade) intended to give my cohorts and me a foretaste of finals. I’ve never taken a test I would describe as entertaining before, but this one qualified. The basic format of a law school exam is as follows: the professor makes up a story containing as many wrongful acts or broken laws as possible. The student’s job is to identify the lawsuits that could arise from the story and analyze the expected legal outcome. So it boils down to writing a serious evaluation of a really wacky story. Apparently, that’s fun for me.

Speaking of wacky stories, here is the Torts case of the week: A woman’s car won’t start, so she goes inside to call a mechanic. On returning to her car, she finds it occupied by a large baboon. (Candler v. Smith, 179 S.E. 395 (Ga. Ap. 1935)). I know it sounds like the start of a joke, but it’s a true story. That would make for a rough morning, wouldn’t it?

The third entertainment of the week: I came across the doctrine of “de minimis non curat lex,” (i.e., the law does not concern itself with trifles). I found this ironic because with everything from rules of citation to minute distinctions and interpretations, the law sometimes seems to be nothing but trifles. (Even the reference I found was in an appellate opinion overturning a lower court’s decision to ignore a small event.) Sometimes I feel like Richard C. Wydick did in describing the fanatical defense of certain grammar rules: “One wonders whether there are not grander things to worry about.” (Plain English for Lawyers, 5^th Ed., Carolina Academic Press 2005, P. 95.)

In other news, the idea I had about not needing to look for a job until next spring has been debunked. My summer job search ostensibly began last Friday. It’s good to plan ahead, I guess. Especially since I’m not yet entirely settled about what direction to take my career.

I suppose it doesn’t matter too much, as long as it’s entertaining.

Moot (Maybe)

I had my first experience with moot court this week. My Torts professor arranged for a local lawyer to come argue a case before a handful of “judges” (law professors or similar) in W&M’s courtroom. It gave him an opportunity to practice an appellate case he’s working on, and it gave my class a taste of a real courtroom case. Our guest argued the plaintiff’s side and my professor argued the defendant’s.

It was interesting to listen to. Shortly into the lawyer’s arguments, the judges interrupted with questions. The end result, rather than a TV lawyer type speech, was a four on one conversation with the judges pushing as hard as they could (in a respectful, dignified way) against the lawyer’s rationale. Of course, my professor received the same treatment. It’s kind of odd to hear the judges suddenly switch their arguments to the other side. And it gave my brain a good workout in trying to keep up.

It was a good illustration of the unknown, grey areas in the law. In fact, there is very seldom a black-and-white “right” answer in law school. The answer is usually maybe. Or probably. Or “we think this is what it means.” Or, “we’re not sure and it would be really nice if the Supreme Court would clarify this for us.” My Torts professor has told us repeatedly, “If you came to law school looking for answers, you might as well head right back out the door.”

And it actually makes sense to have all that fuzzy grey area. If there is a black and white answer, you don’t need a lawyer. As another professor mentioned early in the semester, no one hires a lawyer to tell them what the speed limit is.

Maybe that’s why law school feels so different from other academic endeavors. It’s not about learning facts and knowing answers. The lawyer’s harvest is greater when there are more grey areas.

Switching gears away from the law school front, we had a Relief Society activity on Saturday where I tried to live up to my name and quilt a few stitches on a ward service project quilt (I was pretty slow – I prefer tying quilts to the stitching part).

I’ve also taken to watching Studio C (on YouTube). The comedy is a little over the top sometimes, but it feels good to laugh and it’s nice to watch something lighthearted after reading casebooks (especially the criminal law one).

Outside, a bunch of leaves have now fallen off the trees. There are so many still on the branches that it’s hardly made a dent, but there are certainly rake-able quantities. Leaf blowers are showing up on campus. The trees are generally still green, but perhaps a little less vibrant than before.

So I guess fall has arrived. Maybe.

Geese on the lake closest to my apartment.

My new cutting board (etched glass from yesterday's RS activity).

Read Law

The main greeting question people used to ask me was, “Do you still run?” My move to Williamsburg has ended that 13-year tradition and I’m now usually asked some version of: “How is school?”

It’s a surprisingly difficult question to answer, so my typical reply is something to the effect of, “It’s good. It keeps me busy.” Short and vague.

I suppose the difficulty arises in part because of common preconceptions about law school (for some reason it’s hard for me to give an answer when I feel like the other person is already expecting a certain type of answer). Or maybe it’s because I can’t always tell whether the questioner wants a general benchmark of my status as a law student, or a deeper, analytical reply.  Or perhaps it’s because my impulse is to share the experience rather than the technicalities; the experience is more interesting, but more difficult to put into words. And it takes a great deal of technicality to explain experience.

Well, tonight I’m going to describe one or two technicalities of law school. With any luck, that will give a small taste of the real experience.

In To Kill a Mockingbird, Scout talks about her father going to Montgomery to “read law” (Harper Lee, Ch. 1). I have always liked the ring of that phrase. But I never knew how literal it was until I began “reading law” myself. That’s about what law school amounts to. My homework is a nightly list of items to read. For precision, I could add “talk law” and “write law” to Scout’s description, but the bulk of the work is still reading.

What do I read? Cases. Dozens of them.

I used to think law students spent a lot of time studying constitutional and statutory law – founding documents and subsequent legislation. I’d heard of casebooks, but I imagined the cases were only tangentially related, like colorful illustrations in the margins. Instead I’ve found that the constitutional clause or the statute – if there is one at all – is more like the heading of a chapter which is followed by paragraph after paragraph after paragraph of cases.

And some of those cases are crazy. Last week there was one about an armchair thrown out of a hotel window amidst V-J Day celebrations in 1945. Another case was about a steer falling through the ceiling (note to county and state fairs: please don’t put 600 pound livestock on the second floor). Then there was a case about the robbers who stole a police car in an attempt to escape, then stole another police car when the first one was disabled.

As you can tell, it can be very entertaining. (Side note: it’s remarkable how often alcohol is involved in the events that precede litigation.)

All of this reading has changed my view of what “the law” is. Before school, I would have described the law as the US Constitution, the various state constitutions, and state and federal legislative statutes, with a few regulations thrown in for good measure. But that’s only a small part of it. “The law” also includes the always evolving common law* and innumerable court decisions. I’ve been forever disabused of the grade school notion that the legislative branch makes the law, the executive branch enforces the law, and the judicial branch interprets the law. That’s a nice simplification for elementary civics, but in reality they all make law – especially the judiciary.

*The common law is for wrongful acts such as battery. Legislatures don’t need to make laws (though they can if they want to) to tell people not to hit each other.

So on any given night (unless it’s Sunday), I can be found in various places reading through a handful of cases and trying to distill from them the underlying principles and rationale of “the law.”

Good thing I like to read.

This is the bridge I drive over on my way to and from school each day.

Of Leaves and Patience

Fall is slow to come here in Williamsburg. I feel like I'm stuck in some sort of time suspension because it's October, but it feels like early September. The trees are mostly green, there are all sorts of flowers, and this week the temperature topped 80 degrees. Great running and biking weather, but I'm still itching to rake some leaves.

The season has emphasized a lesson for me, though. As the scenery turns ever so slowly to red, yellow, orange, and brown, it reminds me that things often change more slowly than I expect them to. Or more slowly than I want them to. Or not quite in the manner I hoped for. I'm reminded also that the Lord works "in process of time" (Moses 7:21) and that He will "order all things for [my] good, as fast as [I] am able to receive them" (D&C 111:11).

So I'm trying to be patient and enjoy the leaves that have dressed up for fall. (And I'm enjoying the excuse to play outside as much as I can.)

I Choose This Work

For most of this week, my energy has been caught up in Round 1 of Alternative Dispute Resolution (ADR) Team tryouts. ADR is exactly what it sounds like, alternative means of resolving disputes. For competition purposes, it is split into three sub-areas: negotiation, arbitration, and mediation. Each competitor’s performance is judged and scored. (It’s sort of a law school version of competitive sports.)

Trying out for ADR was very intimidating for me. I had never done anything like this before and it was mostly out of my comfort zone. But I was looking forward to trying something new and it’s good to do something scary every once in a while.

I signed up to try out for several reasons. ADR is a good opportunity to be involved and meet some good people, a good item to put on a resume, a chance to do something new, an opportunity to polish some actual lawyer skills (very few things in law school actually do this; school is mostly about getting someone to think like a lawyer), a potential for a little prestige, etc.

Also, there was an escape clause. By signing up, I agreed to complete Round 1 of tryouts, but if I wanted to, I could choose to withdraw before Round 2. Having that option gave me a sort of cushion for the uncertainties I had about trying out (would I like it, would it take too much time, would it get in the way of other things I want to do, etc.).

Round 1 involved one negotiation and one arbitration by each competitor. Each event was 2 on 2, so competitors were randomly paired, and each pair was assigned to represent the plaintiffs or the defendants in a dispute. We were given a fact pattern for each dispute, which consisted of the general story and facts known to both sides and a set of confidential facts for each side.

My negotiation was Wednesday night. My partner and I were representing Caesar’s Palace (the Las Vegas casino) in its claim against a group of raucous guests who (with the help of some hotel employees) had destroyed an expensive hotel villa. (The story was modeled on the movie The Hangover; it reinforced the fact that I never need to see any part of that film. But it makes a good fact pattern for a dispute.) We had 30 minutes to negotiate a settlement with the other side, while the 2L & 3L ADR team members acted as judges.

My arbitration was on Saturday. My partner and I were representing MTV in a salary dispute with the cast members of Jersey Shore (another show I don’t need to see). Each side had 12 minutes to present their case to a panel of arbitrators (the 2Ls and 3Ls) and an additional 4 minutes of rebuttal.

It was an adventure.

It’s hard to describe the fluctuation in my thoughts and feelings throughout the week. Saying I went back and forth between continuing with Round 2 and withdrawing from the competition is correct in essentials, but much too simplistic. Suffice it to say that I left my Saturday evening arbitration feeling extremely conflicted about whether to continue with the competition. And I had to decide soon since the schedule for Round 2 would be set around midnight.

So, as I went straight from the competition to the General Relief Society Broadcast, as I chatted with the wonderful Jamestown and Williamsburg sisters, and as I munched on some very appreciated (and delicious) appetizers, I felt a continuous mental and emotional undercurrent tied directly to ADR. As the meeting began, I had two prayers: to have an answer and to feel at peace with that answer.

Well, “ask and ye shall receive.” About halfway through the meeting, with half of my attention on the speakers and half of it on ADR, my internal turmoil calmed and I had my answer. But that sounds more quick and dramatic than it was. It wasn’t like a tempest on the sea being calmed; it was more like a restless leaf being blown along the ground until finally coming to rest in a picturesque and quiet corner.

Upon arriving home after the meeting, I sent an email to withdraw from the competition.

The interesting thing is, all the reasons I had pondered for why I might want to withdraw didn’t really add up to my ultimate reason for doing so. I knew and acknowledged all of those conflicts and I was willing to work through them. Instead, what it came down to was a decision between two paths. On the one hand was a valuable, rewarding experience heavily favoring law school and a subsequently strong career. On the other hand was a valuable, rewarding, more obscure path focused less on law school and more on other types of service.

May I emphasize here that neither path was bad or wrong. Both had good and productive and rewarding outcomes. Nor did I have a clear idea of what other types of service are down path number two. “But,” I said in my internal conversation, “if they are mutually exclusive, I choose THIS work.”

My answer did not come in the form of: “This is what you need to do.” Nor was I told whether the two paths are indeed mutually exclusive. Rather, my choice was my answer.* And along with that choice came the peace of letting the other path go.

(*Note: there is a subtle distinction here between two choices. One was a choice between continuing with the competition or not. The other was a choice of broader scope and deeper penetration. It was the second choice that was an answer for the first.)

Trying out for ADR was a good and fun experience. I’ve had an abundance of supplemental thoughts, feelings, and insights resulting from it. And at the core is a valuable gem of spiritual understanding about what I really want. So, I feel very blessed.

(And yes, I’m relieved that I don’t have to worry about studying additional fact patterns this week.)

Continuity is a Nice Way of Saying Stubbornness

This is a short entry. But because I’m stubborn and for continuity’s sake, I wanted to at least post something rather than miss a week.

Reason one for brevity: I spent most of the day working on a photo book project (those always take longer than expected). So I simply don’t have time to write more.

Reason two: The major topic of the past week extends into the coming week. I signed up to participate in the Alternative Dispute Resolution Team tryouts. The ADRT is law school’s version of competitive sports. (There are other competition teams as well.)

Tryouts will be going on all next week. So far, I’ve spent three hours in preparation for the first half of my tryout. That makes the event sound bigger than it is, though. It’s not really that big, just very detailed.

And for me, it’s intimidating. Thus it’s taking a lot of emotional and mental energy. It’s not completely out of my comfort zone, but it’s not completely in it either. (Which means it’s good for me.)

In any case, I may have more to write about ADR next week. Or maybe it will just be a ripple that fades away.

For now, I’m just going to bed.

Vitality

This week the 1Ls were trained on the three big legal research programs: LexisNexis, Bloomberg Law, and Westlaw. Each of these programs has a Bingham Canyon Mine-like trove of information waiting to be delved into. If I hadn't been sitting down for the training, it would have been staggering. Each program also has one or two dozen features for finding, noting, saving, and collecting information. It’s really cool.

From the perspective of a 1L, it’s also overwhelming.

But it drove home a point that was made last week in the Newport News Stake Conference. My Stake President spoke of how life used to be a choice between the important and the unimportant. It used to be enough to recognize something as significant or productive; if the item or event met that standard, it was worth spending time on. But, he suggested, that is no longer the case. Now we are faced with choosing between what is important and what is vital.

The tendency these days is toward more: deeper and broader research, comprehensive coverage, wider authority. As I was listening to the research program presentations, I wondered, “How in the world am I supposed to learn and use all of this information, when it’s all I can do sometimes to keep up with my reading for class?” The answer, of course, is that I’m not supposed to use every bit of data and every tool I've been offered. The key is to use the best tools to sift through the millions of bits of information at my fingertips and find those bits that are vital to my work. Then to leave the rest alone. That itself is a daunting task, but not a jawbreaker.

Strength is not found in “more.” Strength is found in that which is vital. Or to put it another way, that which brings vitality and life.

And as it is in legal research, so it is in life. There are things which are vital that cannot be left undone. That’s not to say there's no time for the good and significant and important. There may even be lots of time for those things. But the vital things are what make life the strongest and richest.

In other news:

• I saw a squirrel try to hide behind its tail by flicking the tail around as if were a cloak (it didn't quite make the squirrel invisible);
• I was happily caught in a shower of autumn leaves on my way to school one morning (other than that, it’s mostly been too warm and green to feel like fall); and
• I learned you can’t sue the devil and his helpers (among other reasons for dismissal, there’s no way to deliver the summons).

New Normal

As I sat reading my homework outside the other night, I was nearly run over by two squirrels squabbling across the deck.  When they realized I was there, one turned tail and fled. The other faced me, fluffed its fur, and stared as if to say, “What are you doing on my deck?” It seemed to be contemplating whether I could be frightened off like its fleeing cohort. I stared back, halfway between amusement at being stared down by a squirrel and relief it hadn't clawed up my leg.

Welcome to my new normal.

I feel like I've been in a fog for a few weeks. I hadn't realized this until one day when I was looking through my fridge and pantry and saw I had nothing much beyond survival food (Fruit by the Foot, granola bars, string cheese…). I wondered how I could have gone to the grocery store without getting something along the line of actual meals. Then as I thought over the last month, it seemed there had been a cloud around me, obscuring everything but the bare necessities. No wonder all I had were jelly beans, apples, and saltine crackers.

But now I feel I’m finally settling into a routine. In evidence of my return to normalcy, I drove to school without having to worry about when to make the next turn, I’m able to have conversations without an undercurrent train of thought reminding me that I’m in Virginia, and I got through my homework without feeling like I’d forgotten to read something. Maybe having a routine gives me time to feel normal.

Of course, by normal I don’t mean I’m used to everything. I was still surprised to see geese around the lake (and hesitant to run through the flock; I've had a mild fear of geese since a goose bit my sister when we were little); I still find the bugs & spiders/people  ratio in Virginia unnecessarily high; and the law school learning curve still feels like a 10% grade. But it doesn't feel like a different world anymore.

It’s nice to be able to wrap my head around the various subjects and feel like I have a general (if unfocused) view of how everything fits together, in school and in life. I was listening to the class this week when a part of me stepped back and delighted in how the sentence my professor had just spoken would have been almost incomprehensible to me two weeks previously.

I’m still occasionally surprised to find myself in law school, but it’s starting to feel like home.

Navigating DOG Street

I’m pleased to confirm that I survived my first full week of law school. The oncoming wave I was staring at apprehensively last week has passed. I came through it, perhaps a little more tired than usual, but unscathed. To continue the metaphor, now I feel as though I’m paddling a kayak in a rough sea. I’m definitely working, but I’m afloat and headed in the right direction.

I have four classes: Legal Practice (a writing and lawyer skills course), Civil Procedure (studying the rules that govern courts and lawsuits), Criminal Law, and Torts. My brother-in-law suggested torts would be a good class if it was about baking. Luckily for me, it isn’t, as my kitchen skills are generally at the cook-some-pasta-and-add-a-vegetable-to-it level.

Law school has a very steep learning curve. I feel like I’ve learned a great deal and yet only scratched the surface. My understanding of the subject has turned nearly 180 degrees in the last week, and I feel like I’m doing something completely different than I expected. It’s a good difference, though. I’m finding law very interesting. And I enjoy the mental workout. Settling my classes, homework, work hours, errands, and other activities into a new routine has been fun.

“Other activities” this week included a special tour for the 1Ls around the law school related parts of Colonial Williamsburg with a professional tour guide (and a short talk from “George Wythe.” Our guide told us about some of the founders of the law school, told us stories from Revolutionary times, and led us by some of the 88 (+/-) original colonial buildings in the town, including the courthouse and the Wren Building (the original college). We were then invited to a reception with Dean Douglas (Dean of the Law School), who took some time to talk to each group. It was nice to hear from him in a small group setting.

I’m on another learning curve as well: Williamsburg itself. I was in class the other day when someone mentioned DOG Street. It took me a minute to put DOG Street together with Duke of Gloucester Street (you can see why it has an acronym). The learning curve for Williamsburg isn’t as steep as the one for law school, but I definitely have a heightened sense of my surroundings. I like noticing the moss on the trees, the funny shaped leaves, the crowd of deer crossing the road (I was very glad to notice those), and the blue-tailed lizards on the walkway. I enjoy the process of building my mental map (yes, I have a mental map; considering my lackluster directional skills, this may surprise some of my family). Getting out for a few short runs and a bike ride, taking a wrong turn, wandering around a little before figuring out how to get back to the law school at the end of the tour…it’s all just different versions of exploring.  

I guess you could say the highlight of this week has been navigating all the newness and finding it to be a good fit. I’ve known, almost from an external point of view, that this is the right place for me to be. But this week I felt it more completely, as if I’ve been given a glimpse down the road of the impact this experience will have on my life.

So, I’m happy. 

Treading Water

I began the week feeling like I was at the top of a roller coaster, right at the edge before gravity kicks in. That feeling lasted through Wednesday. I was in one-day-at-a-time mode, just getting through the next thing on the list. Finally on Thursday I managed to start thinking a little beyond the next 24 hours. Friday was almost easy; I was done early, did my laundry, and tackled some more unpacking (which I’d been doing piecemeal throughout the week after my possessions arrived in town on Monday). On Saturday, I was ready for a break. And ready to not have an apartment full of boxes. So I spent the preponderance of the day reading (a novel, not my homework) and getting through all my organizing except for two smallish piles and seven boxes of books.

Then I looked at my schedule for the next week. It turns out I should have started my homework a little earlier (I did do a few hours’ worth on Saturday night). I went from feeling like I was approaching the tail end of a roller coaster to feeling like I was treading water. Not drowning, but working to keep my chin above the water and staring at a huge, approaching wave. And I’m not sure what kind of shape I’ll be in when the wave gets to me. Or what the weather will be like on the other side.

That said, I’m looking forward to the year. The small taste I’ve gotten in this first week has been intriguing and refreshing. And there are some very good people around me. At school, apparently everyone is ready to answer any questions that may occur to the 1Ls. At home, I’ve been blessed with some timely and unexpected help (in the form of a kind neighbor who helped move things into my apartment and his wife who brought over a fresh apple cobbler) and encouragement (in the form of a handful of notes my sister hid throughout the apartment before I dropped her off at the airport). I’ve been well taken care of.

The other good news is that I managed to find my way to school and back several times without taking a wrong turn and without using my GPS. That’s encouraging for someone with almost no sense of direction. Next project: learn my way to the grocery store…

Shrink-Wrapped Cheerios

It has been a long week, but a good one. Long because every day has felt like two: one part driving and one part being on vacation. Long because it’s the start of a completely new phase of life and new things seem to take more time than things I’m accustomed to. And long because I’m counting the Friday we left, so it’s really 10 days rather than a week.

It’s been good for many, many reasons.

I won’t go through the litany of things we saw and places we stopped on the way to Williamsburg. Suffice it to say we’ve seen nearly 3,000 more miles of the good old USA and checked three more states off of my list (I’ve now been on the ground in 41 states!). Thanks to some generous souls and a terrific support team, we had a smooth, virtually problem-free journey highlighted by an excellent sendoff and a couple of good visits on the way.

So now I’m in Williamsburg and I’ve started unpacking. One of the items I pulled out was a Ziplock bag of Cheerios. Filled in Salt Lake and nestled into a square portion of my box of food, it came out in the sea level air pressure looking shrink-wrapped. It stayed in its box shape until I opened the bag to eat some cereal this morning.

In some ways I feel like that shrink-wrapped bag of Cheerios. Before, I felt free and easy. I had room to move and I knew what I was able to do. I felt prepared and confident. Now I feel a little sucked in and tight, like there’s pressure all around me and I don’t have much flexibility. And I’m not sure what shape I’ll be in when the bag opens and I’m exposed to a whole collection of new experiences.

But I do know things will work out. For whatever reason, I know I’m supposed to be here doing what I’m doing. And I know there’s a path prepared for me to follow.

And if a few cheerios get spilled along the way, no worries. Life goes on and I intend to go on with it.